Montessori Parenting
I have been on a journey of implementing Montessori with my four children for over a decade. And I can confidently say that Montessori parenting is different than Montessori education or Montessori homeschooling.
As a Montessori Mama, for over a decade I have been integrating principles of Dr. Maria Montessori into my parenting style, which in turn has become a journey or self-transformation. I've been home schooling my four children in the Montessori style, either by creating a full classroom with shelves and Montessori materials, or packing two suitcases of materials to take to Europe. We did Montessori schooling in cafes and coffee shops in Spain, Portugal, and the UK.
The Montessori approach for me is not only activities, printables, and educating children. For me it has become a mindset and a lifestyle.
In 2012, together with Chris, my husband, I founded a music based, Montessori inspired daycare in Cambridge, MA. We decided that alongside music, the Montessori philosophy would be at the heart of the methodology and educational approach in our center.
Today, as a part of my postpartum education journey, I am developing postpartum resources and a program for parents of the Rock and Roll Daycare Community.
The more I slow down and observe our day to day, I can see how in many situations my children are actually teaching me. Their responses to challenges or stressful situations give me an example of how I can better handle it.
I realize that because they don't have adult baggage, they don't have the lens of negative experiences, They can respond from a very pure and innocent state of being. Only if I can be mindful and present in the moment, I have an opportunity to learn from them.
Dr. Maria Montessori would say that the child is the maker of man; the child is our teacher. She would even go as far as calling the child “our father”, because from being a child, learning and absorbing our earliest experiences, we become adults. Those hands-on experiences form our intelligence, character, personality - they become a part of the child’s - and later on - the adult's soul.
But when we try to impose something on them, when they don’t get to have a concrete experience with a concept, it would only create more resentment and refusal on their side. We can make a parallel here: if you try to do something that is very interesting to you, but someone just appears and does it for you, without your consent, it would be highly annoying. It is the same with children.
A Montessori concept I learned is that we don't make our children share. The statement “sharing is caring” can be harmful. It is child’s toy, it is their own property, we can’t claim that they have to share. They are trying to figure out the world through their own hands-on experiences, touching and observing a certain toy or material. If somebody comes in and wants to take it away from them, it is a violation of their boundaries, so to speak.
When we insist that “sharing is caring”, we can end up with adults who do not have any understanding of their boundaries, or how to protect them. We have to relearn it in our adult years. But how much more powerful it is to let the child learn their boundaries in a healthy and safe environment, as they learn language and movement, so that it becomes “a part of their soul”.
As parents, you don’t have to homeschool your children to be a Montessori parent. Montessori is above all a mindset, a lifestyle. It is a way of being. I first learned it in regards to being a mother, with my children. But shortly after I realized: it is a way that I can also be with Chris, with friends and co-workers... with all other adults..
For me, Montessori is an all encompassing way of life. Of being a mother, an educator, a yoga teacher and postpartum doula. 🌹🌹🌹
Writing compliments of
Zaure Vuk, Montessori Mama.
Born and raised in Kazakhstan, and has been living in Boston, MA for the last 15 years. Her background is in musicology. Music brought her to the States, and
music is how she met her husband in 2007 at School of Groove (Cambridge, MA).
In 2012 Zaure and her husband Chris started a music and Montessori based daycare center, Rock and Roll Daycare (Cambridge, MA). Over the last decade she has been studying Montessori and today she loves sharing Montessori life transforming principles and how they can become a great framework within which parents can develop their own parenting style. After having four children, Zaure now wants to bring more awareness to the needs of the postpartum period, desiring to help parents confidently and mindfully navigate all the transitions of this special time Zaure loves travelling and reading in coffee shops around the world. She enjoys learning languages and exploring deep questions of humanity and spirituality.
Here at the Center for Sacred Window Studies, we share voices from many perspectives and backgrounds. We believe that the sacred weeks post birth, and the experience of humanity is experienced in countless ways. We learn by listening to one another and honoring our stories. The views and opinions of our writers do not necessarily reflect the mission, viewpoints or opinions of the Center for Sacred Window Studies.
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